Six Divorce Myths Busted!

Divorce Myths: Don’t Fall For Inaccurate Information. Be Proactive, Consult With An Experienced Family Law Attorney

There are a ton of myths and misconceptions surrounding obtaining a divorce. Having practiced family law work for 40+ years, I thought I would try to provide some accurate information and perhaps shatter some of the falsehoods.

Myth #1: Mothers Always Get Custody

Many years ago, this may have been true. But that is not the case now. There is a national trend towards equalizing parenting time as much as possible between the parties. Facts really matter in determining custody! In Ohio, the core principle of determining custody/shared parenting comes down to determining the “best interests” of the children. A lot of fathers get custody and/or equal parenting time under a shared parenting plan.

Myth #2: Only Women Get Spousal Support (Alimony)

This was never really the case. Sure, in the past men were the predominant “bread winners”. Many women earn more money than their husband. There are many factors the Court considers when determining spousal support. The alimony statute in Ohio is gender blind. Gross income plays a large role in that determination. But if the husband is the “financially disadvantaged party” and it is the type of case that spousal support is generally awarded, it will be awarded to the husband. Fair is fair!

Myth #3: Children Can Choose Who They Want to Live With

There was an “Age of Election” law in Ohio many years ago, where a child over age 12 could pick with whom he or she wished to live after a divorce. That law was replaced with statute 3109.04 that allows the Court to consider the wishes of the child and place more weight on those wishes the older the child is. There are 10 factors that by statute the Court must consider before issuing an Order of custody. So, the child cannot at any age in Ohio, select or determine which parent gets custody. Typically, the closer to age 18 the child is, the more weight those wishes carry.

Myth #4: Assets and Debts are Always Divided Equally in a Divorce

This is another myth. Ohio is an equitable division (not an EVEN division) state. Equitable does not mean even. The Court will consider a multitude of factors when dividing property and debts including, the parties’ respective incomes, what the debts were for and who incurred them, was there financial misconduct by one of the parties etc. to end up with a fair division. So, while an equal division would likely be the starting point, the ending point may be far from equal.

Myth #5: If I File for Divorce, it Will Be Contentious

This is true no doubt in many cases, but not in all cases. Lots of people are able to set emotions aside and put on their “business hat”, and through negotiations or mediation come to a full agreement on all issues including custody/shared parenting, division of property and support. Many Courts have adopted mediation and set settlement conference in their routine procedures. These are aimed at a goal of resolving any contested issues. I am also seeing that perhaps due to the pandemic in part, people have become more adaptive and flexible. It seems that more matters are resolving themselves with a lot less contention!

Myth #6: I Don’t Need an Attorney for my Divorce

Even in situations where the parties agree on divorce related issues, getting through the process is still complicated and there are many technical requirements that need to be considered to protect each party. The Court will not alert litigants to them either! One does not want to end up with a Court Order fraught with hidden time-bombs that can significantly alter what you thought you agreed to! Many of these “errors” are impossible to rectify after the fact!

Courts Not User Friendly, Take The Correct Steps

Always consult with an experienced family law attorney before agreeing or signing any Court papers. Divorce procedures and Courts are not really user friendly and the correct steps to take can be counter intuitive. Being proactive in this regard can literally save you thousands of dollars to “get it right” from the start.

These are some of the biggest myths I routinely have seen over the years. There are many more that I will share in a follow-up blog article.

Experienced, Trusted and Professional Dayton Divorce Lawyers

Our experienced Dayton divorce lawyers at Holzfaster, Cecil, McKnight & Mues can assist you with your divorce or dissolution related issues. To learn more, please go to our website at www.hcmmlaw.com or call us at 937 293-2141. We can schedule an in-person conference or one by phone or Zoom. We look forward to assisting you!

Tell Us About Your Case.

© 2021, Ohio Family Law Blog. All rights reserved.