The Main Reason For Marrying Says Divorce Study? It’s Not Love!
According to a study by McKinley Irvin, approximately 42-45% of marriages in the United States end in divorce. The same study also found that 60% of second marriages and 73% of third marriages end in divorce. In 2021, there were 689,308 divorces across the 45 U.S. states that report this statistic. During that same year, 1,985,072 marriages occurred, making the U.S. marriage rate 6 per 1,000 people.
It can be beneficial for a couple to understand the causes for failed marriages. If you are already married it can help you to make your own marriage stronger. If you are about to walk down the aisle it can guide you in making choices about your intended wedding. It can even help you to support other couples in your life that you care about.
I recently read an article published in Forbes Magazine where they reported on their findings of a survey they had conducted. Click here to read that article. Forbes Advisor conducted a survey of 1000 Americans who are in the process of getting a divorce, or who are already divorced, to determine why marriages failed. Admittingly so, I am a bit of a “statistic geek”, but I found the article to be quite interesting.
Lack of Family Support No. 1 Reason For Divorce
The article said that it is helpful to explore the reasons people marry in order to fully understand the causes of divorce. Among the 1000 people interviewed, 42% of the women interviewed cited marrying for financial security was the number one motivating factor. Love came in a close second with 39% of women saying that it was the main reason for marriage. Of all participants, both male and female, 39% felt a need for companionship was most important. Somewhat surprising is that the second most common factor for men was a desire to start a family. Other factors why couples got married included societal and family pressure, medical insurance, legal reasons convenience and making a commitment.
When looking at the statistics as to the reason why the people in the study cited for getting a divorce, the most common reason was a lack of family support. There were of course many other reasons for divorce, although interestingly the reasons varied depending on how long the two were together. 595 of people who ended their marriages within the first year declared a lack of compatibility. For marriages lasting, say 2-8 years, the lack of family support became an issue as time progressed. For couples married for 9 or more years, divorce was prompted by serious issues such as lack of intimacy or infidelity.
Poor Behaviors Lead To Conflict Within The Marriage
There is a correlation between reasons to get married and reasons to end a marriage. If a person is motivated to get married and that reason is not fulfilled, there is a greater chance that the marriage will not last. If one marries for companionship, to start a family, medical insurance, financial security or legal reasons, and these expectations are not met then the interviewed couples cited lack of compatibility. Couples who entered into a union due to family or societal pressures were more likely to have extramarital affairs. Often, they felt pressure into committing to a marriage although in the end they were less likely to honor that commitment.
In the survey, 4 in 10 people listed behaviors, such as poor conflict resolution, a lack of interest in one another, and lack of time spent together as red flags as to why the marriage was in danger of surviving. It is a common theory that money can be the leading factor of divorce, however the people interviewed stated that financial issues as well as marrying too young, or too soon after meeting were the least common signs that the marriage was doomed.
Divorce is often a result of many months or years of conflict. In the survey 46% of those interviewed said they fought over career choices. 4 out of 10 surveyed said disagreements over how household labor was divided, parenting style differences and relationships with other family members, were leading causes for conflict within the marriage.
How Married And Divorced Individuals Can Learn From This Survey
On the positive side, survey takers believed that if they had exhibited different behaviors, they could have saved their union. 56% of those surveyed said that if had a clearer understanding of their mate’s values and morals they may not have gotten divorced. 63% of those who did get a divorce said that if they had a better understanding of their spouse’s commitment, they might not have gotten divorced. More that 4 out of 10 stated that if they had waited longer to get married and also waited longer to start a family, perhaps the marriage could have been saved.
Perhaps thinking about this information will help both married and divorced individuals better appreciate and understand factors often causing divorce.
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Attorney Robert “Chip” Mues has been focusing his legal practice throughout Southwest Ohio primarily in divorce and family law matters since 1978. Chip is passionate about family law and has proudly published the Ohio Family Law Blog since 2007. In addition, he is the managing partner of Holzfaster, Cecil, McKnight & Mues. To learn more about him or the law firm, visit the firm’s website at www.hcmmlaw.com. Appointments are available in person, over the phone or by Zoom. Call us at 937 293-2141.
