Holidays: Just Say No & Feel Empowered!

A person enjoying a peaceful holiday moment, symbolizing effective holiday stress management and setting boundaries.

Holidays Got Your Down? Holiday stress management might be in order.

PUBLISHERS NOTE: Congratulations! We all made it through Thanksgiving. So, the mad dash of the holiday season is officially upon us. Take a breath. Slow down. And just say “no.”

A Guide to Happier Holidays: Replace HO–HO-HO with NO-NO-NO!

A person enjoying a peaceful holiday moment, symbolizing effective holiday stress management and setting boundaries.Well, the holiday hoopla is ramping up. Displays of sparkly red and green stuff has taken center stage in our stores, catalogues are arriving in droves, internet sites are offering deals, discounts and sales on every imaginable product. Magazines at the grocery checkout display unbelievable glossy covers of gorgeous people, in gorgeous houses, serving gorgeous food. Now with the sudden drop in temperature and the promise of snow this week, the reality that the holidays are descending on us is unavoidable.

It feels impossible to slow this down or simply get a grip. It is like being swept up in some tinselly tidal wave. I don’t want to shop yet; I still am cleaning out the garden! Yet, as the heat clicks on, and my sweaters and even gloves begin to take center stage, it cannot be denied. Here comes the holidays.

Much has been written about how to … Read More... “Holidays: Just Say No & Feel Empowered!”

Blast From The Past: Dealing with the Holidays if You Are in Divorce Transition [2022]

college girl sitting on leaves in yard with hands raised

Going through a divoce transition? Tips for the holidays

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: Donna F. Ferber, LPC, LADC is a psychotherapist in private practice since 1986 in Farmington, Connecticut. She is a licensed professional counselor, a licensed alcohol and drug abuse counselor and an educator. In her private practice, Donna specializes in issues related to life transitions. These include but are not limited to divorce, remarriage, chronic illness, loss, relocation. Donna has been a guest contributor to the Ohio Family Law Blog since 2010. We have enjoyed collaborating on several articles over the years.

Make The Holiday Season One That Is Meaningful

holidays divorce transitionEvery major life event, whether joyful or sad, brings on a period of transition as we adjust to the “new normal.” Even though these periods of transition occur throughout our lives, each requires us to discover a new and unique path as we struggle to move through uncharted waters. The death of a loved one, a divorce, a family estrangement, an illness, or sudden unemployment are some of the changes that shake us to our core. We are challenged in ways we could not imagine.

And in the midst of all this upheaval, the leaves  are beginning to turn and … Read More... “Blast From The Past: Dealing with the Holidays if You Are in Divorce Transition [2022]”

Blast From The Past: Don’t Create Halloween Horrors for your Child! [2022]

halloween divorce

PUBLISHERS NOTE: “Halloween can be very tricky for divorced parents. Here is some great advice from Psychotherapist Donna Ferber from way back in 2010 and 2018. If you enjoy this article, you would love her book, “From Ex-Wife to Exceptional Life: A Woman’s Journey Through Divorce” available on Amazon and Kindle. Also, check out her website, www.DonnaFerber.com.”

Make Your Child’s Halloween A Positive Experience Post Divorce

halloween divorceFor many kids, Halloween is one of the most important holidays of the year. The child of divorce is faced with choices and concerns. Who will take me treat-or-treating? Who will get my costume and dress me? Where will I trick-or-treat?

Then, of course, there logistical problems for the divorced parents. By addressing these issues in advance, parents can reduce stress and not distract from the child’s positive experience. These include:

  • In two-parent homes, often one parent gives out candy while the other parent takes the child trick-or-treating. Now there is only one parent in the home. Do you stay and give out candy or do you go with your child?
  • Parents often do not specify in their divorce decree who “gets” the child on October 31. If it falls on a visitation
Read More... “Blast From The Past: Don’t Create Halloween Horrors for your Child! [2022]”

Blast From The Past: Coping with Difficult Behavior

Blast from the past 13 years Ohio Family Law Blog

How to Cope with Difficult Behavior and Difficult People in a Divorce

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: This blog from guest contributor, Donna F. Ferber, LPC, LADC, is as meaningful today as it was when we originally posted it on May 1, 2010! We have a ton of interesting articles in our archives of the Ohio Family Law Blog. Use our Search tool and enjoy a few oldie but goodies!

difficult behavior divorceThroughout life, we sometimes encounter difficult people. We may argue with them, fall silent, comply or take distance. In a divorce, particularly an acrimonious one, difficult behaviors abound. No one is on their best behavior under this amount of stress. Figuring out how to cope with difficult behavior  is a bit easier once you can identify why a person behaves in a certain way and what he/she hopes to accomplish.

Here is a list of the most common behaviors that frustrate us all and suggestions for dealing with them:

The Bully – uses temper tantrums to overwhelm you; makes insulting and cutting remarks. Needs to feel superior and not lose control of the situation. Wants to get his/her own way.

*Stand up, listen, do not attack back, and take time-outs. Keep … Read More... “Blast From The Past: Coping with Difficult Behavior”

Dealing with the Holidays if You Are in Divorce Transition

college girl sitting on leaves in yard with hands raised

Going through a divoce transition? Tips for the holidays

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: Donna F. Ferber, LPC, LADC is a psychotherapist in private practice for over 35 years in Farmington, Connecticut. She is a licensed professional counselor, a licensed alcohol and drug abuse counselor and an educator. In her private practice, Donna specializes in issues related to life transitions. These include but are not limited to divorce, remarriage, chronic illness, loss, relocation. Donna has been a guest contributor to the Ohio Family Law Blog since 2010. We have enjoyed collaborating on several articles over the years.

Make The Holiday Season One That Is Meaningful

holidays divorce transitionEvery major life event, whether joyful or sad, brings on a period of transition as we adjust to the “new normal.” Even though these periods of transition occur throughout our lives, each requires us to discover a new and unique path as we struggle to move through uncharted waters. The death of a loved one, a divorce, a family estrangement, an illness, or sudden unemployment are some of the changes that shake us to our core. We are challenged in ways we could not imagine.

And in the midst of all this upheaval, the leaves  are beginning to … Read More... “Dealing with the Holidays if You Are in Divorce Transition”

Blast From The Past: Holidays: Just Say No & Feel Empowered!

Blast from the past 13 years Ohio Family Law Blog

Holidays Got Your Down?

PUBLISHERS NOTE: “Congratulations! We all made it through Thanksgiving. So, the mad dash of the holiday season is officially upon us. This sage advice from psychotherapist, Donna F. Ferber, from 2013 warrants another repost. Take a breath. Slow down. And just say “no”.”

A Guide to Happier Holidays: Replace HO–HO-HO with NO-NO-NO!

holidaysWell, the holiday hoopla is ramping up. Displays of sparkly red and green stuff has taken center stage in our stores, catalogues are arriving in droves, internet sites are offering deals, discounts and sales on every imaginable product. Magazines at the grocery checkout display unbelievable glossy covers of gorgeous people, in gorgeous houses, serving gorgeous food. Now with the sudden drop in temperature and the promise of snow this week, the reality that the holidays are descending on us is unavoidable.

It feels impossible to slow this down or simply get a grip. It is like being swept up in some tinselly tidal wave. I don’t want to shop yet; I still am cleaning out the garden! Yet, as the heat clicks on, and my sweaters and even gloves begin to take center stage, it cannot be denied. Here comes the holidaysRead More... “Blast From The Past: Holidays: Just Say No & Feel Empowered!”

Blast From The Past: What and How to Tell Your Children About Your Divorce

Blast from the past 13 years Ohio Family Law Blog

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: What is the best way to tell children about their parents divorcing? This is a frequent question I am asked. I can’t tell you how many times over the years that I have sent clients a link to this 2010 article from Connecticut Psychotherapist Donna F. Ferber. Surely sage advice for all times!

divorce children parents

One of the most difficult things you will ever have to do as a parent is tell your children that their parents are breaking up. It is important that you shift your focus from your loss to your children’s loss. Divorce is about the dissolution  of a husband-wife relationship. It marks a change  in the parent-child relationship. Staying aware of this difference will help you effectively support your children. In talking with your children, stay focused on their feelings about this experience. If you focus on the spousal relationship, your own feelings may get in the way of good parenting.

Here are some tips for explaining the divorce to your children:

  • If possible, both parents should be present. This illustrates to the children  that you will still be able to co-parent.
  • Tell them close to the time that one of the
Read More... “Blast From The Past: What and How to Tell Your Children About Your Divorce”
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