Robert L. Mues, Author at Ohio Family Law Blog

Are Divorce Lawyers Just “Love Undertakers”? [A Rebuttal]

Divorce Lawyers Should Not Assist Clients With Mental Health Issues Says NYC Attorney

A well respected New York City divorce lawyer by the name of Val Kleyman recently sent out a newswire to divorce lawyers warning them “to be careful not to cross over into the role of personal therapist for clients. This is a common problem that does not get enough attention” Attorney Kleyman said. He added, “helping someone deal with their emotions, feelings and mental health is a very serious undertaking and must only be done by professionals who are trained and experienced doing this.”

While I agree with most of that, here is the point he made that hit me hard. “Divorce lawyers are the love undertakers. Unlike marriage counselors and therapists whose job it is to save relationships and help people heal, our job is to bury dead marriages quickly and efficiently before their toxicity spreads any further,” says Kleyman.

WOW, I have to disagree with Attorney Kleyman a bit on this one. This seems far too limited of a view of our role as a divorce lawyer in my opinion. I have been practicing family law and divorce work in Dayton, Ohio for 40 years. … Read More... “Are Divorce Lawyers Just “Love Undertakers”? [A Rebuttal]”

Blast From The Past: 10 Tips To Cut Your Attorney Fees

Blast from the past 13 years Ohio Family Law Blog

PUBLISHER’S UPDATE: Here is one of my favorites posts about attorney fees from back on August 8, 2009! The advice rings as true now as it did then…We have a ton of interesting articles in our archives of the Ohio Family Law Blog. Use our Search tool and enjoy a few oldie but goodies!

Tips To Reduce Attorney Fees And Save On Divorce Costs

I would like to share some constructive fee-cutting suggestions for you to consider implementing after you have done your “due diligence” in selecting the right attorney for you and your issues. Many of the cases I have handled over the last 30 years are family law matters which are engagements typically based upon the number of hours spent in the representation. The amount of time to complete these cases varies based upon many factors, including the nature of the issues, contentiousness of the parties, and the cooperation level existing between both counsel.

Recently, I have been asked by several clients what they can do to help reduce their attorney fees. Certainly, this is an excellent question especially with money being so tight and all of us having to deal with our poor economy. Each attorney would … Read More... “Blast From The Past: 10 Tips To Cut Your Attorney Fees”

Can I Demand Proof Where my Ex Spends the Child Support I Pay?

Can A Parent Request Accounting Of The Child Support Expenses?

This is a frequent question that I hear as a Dayton, Ohio, divorce lawyer. In Ohio, the short answer is “no” as long as the child’s basic needs are being taken care of. There are a few states (such as Washington) which allow for a parent to request an accounting of the child support expenditures.

In most states there is a common misconception that child support must be spent on things that ONLY benefit the child only. In Ohio, child support may be used to pay for a very broad range of expenses including:

Food
Clothing
Mortgage/rent of the home where the child lives
Utility bills, internet, cell phones
Medical expenses
Transportation and vehicle costs (including gas, auto insurance and car repairs)
Childcare/babysitters/camp costs/sports/extracurricular activities
School fees and supplies
Entertainment for the child
Any miscellaneous expenses that contribute to the general welfare of the child.

Does the Custodial Parent need to Account for the Support Money?

This is a corollary question to the one above. The general answer in Ohio is “no”. Nonetheless, if this issue is raised, it would be prudent to look back over the past month or … Read More... “Can I Demand Proof Where my Ex Spends the Child Support I Pay?”

LEGAL ALERT: New Ohio Minimum Age to Marry is 18 Absent Court Order

PUBLISHERS NOTE: We have blogged about this situation twice before. First, on May 12, 2018, in Teen Marriages and the Push for Reform in Ohio and then on January 12, 2019, shortly after Ohio Governor John Kasich signed the new law abolishing underage marriage in most all cases. Click here to read that post. That new law just became effective on April 8, 2019. We have kept our readers up-to-date on this because underage marriage and human trafficking are important issues in society. So, here is the latest update…

Minimum Age To Marry In Ohio Is Now 18. Underage Marriage Permitted Only With Juvenile Court Consent

Children under age 17 will no longer be permitted to marry in Ohio as a new child marriage law took effect on April 8, 2019. This issue was investigated by the Dayton Daily News in 2017 when it found that 4,443 girls age 17 or younger were married in Ohio between 2000 and 2015, including 59 who were 15 and younger. State records show three girls age 14 were married. This included a Montgomery County case in which a Juvenile Judge approved a marriage between a 14 year old pregnant girl and a … Read More... “LEGAL ALERT: New Ohio Minimum Age to Marry is 18 Absent Court Order”

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. Learn more and watch singer, Jana Kramer explain the ‘Hot Chocolate Talk.’

Singer Jana Kramer’s Hot Chocolate Talk Campaign To Protect Children From Child Abuse

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: Child abuse is horrible! We all need to be more aware of the signs of child abuse and its extent is truly alarming. Below is an excellent press release and video of Jana Kramer from April 2, 2019 discussing child abuse, which they have encouraged me to repost. Locally, in the Dayton area, please consider making a gift to the CARE House Child Advocacy Center which supports more than a thousand kids annually! The work that they do is AWESOME! Here is a link to their website: http://thecarehouse.org/how-to-help/donate/

In support of Child Abuse Prevention Month this April, Jana Kramer, country music singer and actor, has partnered with Committee for Children (CFC), the global leader in research-based social-emotional learning (SEL) programs, to educate parents about their role in child sexual abuse prevention. The Hot Chocolate Talk campaign is designed to get families talking about child sexual abuse, which research shows can protect children against future harm.

“We are thrilled Jana is joining us for our annual Hot Chocolate Talk campaign. Jana is an accomplished woman but maybe most importantly, a mother and great role … Read More... “April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. Learn more and watch singer, Jana Kramer explain the ‘Hot Chocolate Talk.’”

Blast From The Past: Divorce Lawyer: Should I Hire a Male or Female?

PUBLISHER’S UPDATE: Here is one of my favorite divorce lawyer posts from back on January 5, 2013! The advice rings as true now as it did then…We have a ton of interesting articles in our archives of the Ohio Family Law Blog. Use our Search tool and enjoy a few oldie but goodies!

How Gender Of Your Attorney Will Have Very Little Impact On The Final Outcome Of Your Divorce

There are many factors to consider when selecting your divorce or custody lawyer. One of the common concerns is whether or not a divorce litigant will be better off having a male or female divorce lawyer representing him or her.

Some people think that if they want an “aggressive” divorce lawyer, they need a male; but if they want someone who is “compassionate,” they should hire a female divorce lawyer. Should the lawyer be a feisty “take no prisoners” divorce lawyer or does it make sense to have a “nice person” approach in the courtroom? I’ve heard some men say that they would prefer to have a woman represent them because an aggressive female attorney can soften the harshness of husband’s arguments against his wife. For example, a male … Read More... “Blast From The Past: Divorce Lawyer: Should I Hire a Male or Female?”

The Times of the Year When Most Divorces Occur

Do Major Holidays Impact Your Marriage And Lead To Divorce?

Weather, and holidays affect our moods, but do divorce rates spike with the seasons? According to researchers in the state of Washington, the peak months for divorce filings occur in March and August, which is the period following summer and winter holidays.

Many couples tend to steer away from filing for divorce around Christmas or Hanukah, and also around summer vacation time. These are typically special times for families and couples going through difficult times are hopeful that holiday/vacation time is a time to help mend a troubled relationship and to have a new start. People often approach the holidays or a vacation trip with high expectations, but these times can be very stressful and emotionally charged. When the occasion doesn’t live up to their expectations, the unhappiness festers.

According to the research done by University of Washington sociologists the two peak months for divorce filings are March and August. Many couples, at least with children, opt for August as it is after summer vacation and before the kids head back to school.

March Is The Time For Divorce According To Study

But why March? The holidays are well … Read More... “The Times of the Year When Most Divorces Occur”

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