Divorce: 25 Details Often Overlooked in Negotiations!

Two Founding Members Of The International Academy of Attorneys for Divorce over 50 Compile Their List!

divorceAttorney Mark Chinn of Jacksonville, Mississippi, caught my attention with a divorce post to his family law blog about some items that are frequently forgotten in many divorce agreements. Mark is the author of three American Bar Association books about family law issues and is a frequent writer and lecturer in the field of family law. In addition to these accomplishments, we are both founding members of the International Academy of Attorneys for Divorce over 50, established in 2010.

The first eleven in the divorce list were Mark’s, the rest were some that I have added.

  1. Garage door openers
  2. Gate remote controls
  3. Extra keys to car and house
  4. Security codes
  5. Hotel credit card and airline points
  6. Utility and other deposits
  7. Tax and insurance escrows
  8. Car tag credits
  9. Overdrafts on joint checking accounts
  10. Dates to carry through insurance coverages
  11. Attorney’s fees paid with joint funds
  12. Real estate escrow account refunds
  13. Important days not addressed in the Court’s Parenting  Time Order
  14. Season ticket rights
  15. Country club membership and club access
  16. Storage unit details
  17. Dividing and copying family photos
  18. Copying documents, pictures and files from the
Read More... “Divorce: 25 Details Often Overlooked in Negotiations!”

Parenting Time and Child Support In Ohio, The New Initiative

New Parenting Time and Child Support Project in Ohio To Increase Time A Child Spends With Both Parents, Even If They Are Divorced or Separated

parenting timeI have been practicing family law for 34 years. In my opinion the process by which the State of Ohio has gone about establishing child support orders in Juvenile Court without including any parenting or visitation provisions was patently unfair to fathers. I appreciate that taxpayers shouldn’t have to shoulder the burdens of paying welfare or other assistance for children when it is the joint legal responsibility for their mothers and fathers to do so. But is it fair to establish a child support obligation and not include any reciprocal provision for the fathers to have the right to visit their child(ren)? It is no wonder that there are so many uninvolved fathers out there. Psychologists will tell you that a child who has had both parents involved in his/her upbringing stands a much better chance to become a stable healthy adult. That is why I am very excited about this new, long overdue Ohio project!

Ohio’s New PTOC12 Project

This new statewide project in Ohio will try to increase the time a child spends … Read More... “Parenting Time and Child Support In Ohio, The New Initiative”

Divorce Lawyer: Should I Hire a Male or Female?

How Gender Of Your Attorney Will Have Very Little Impact On The Final Outcome Of Your Divorce

divorceThere are many factors to consider when selecting your divorce or custody lawyer.  One of the common concerns is whether or not a divorce litigant will be better off having a male or female divorce lawyer representing him or her.  Some people think that if they want an “aggressive” divorce lawyer, they need a male; but if they want someone who is “compassionate,” they should hire a female divorce lawyer.  Should the lawyer be a feisty “take no prisoners” divorce lawyer or does it make sense to have a “nice person” approach in the courtroom?  I’ve heard some men say that they would prefer to have a woman represent them because an aggressive female attorney can soften the harshness of husband’s arguments against his wife.  For example, a male attorney criticizing a wife’s choice not to work outside the home can appear cruel or attacking, but those arguments made by a female attorney could score points in a less offensive manner.

The true answer to this quandary is that there isn’t one personality type or gender that is right for every custody or … Read More... “Divorce Lawyer: Should I Hire a Male or Female?”

Divorce And Household Chores, Does It Also Divide The Family?

A New Divorce Study Suggests that It Does!

divorceI confess that I am a bit of a junkie of surveys and studies. So I am always on the lookout for interesting ones that relate to family and/or divorce issues. Recently, I came across this Norwegian study that found the divorce rate among couples who shared housework equally with their husband was around 50 percent higher than among those where the wives did most of the housework.  I showed write-ups about it to my wife of 34 years, and she immediately scowled and dismissively said something like, “Yeah right.”  So at the risk of alienating my wife and also being politically incorrect, I decided to share the findings here.

In what many may conclude is a slap in the face of gender equality, the report found the divorce rate among couples who shared housework equally, was around 50 percent higher than among those where the woman did most of the housework.

“What we’ve seen is that sharing equal responsibility for work in the home doesn’t necessarily contribute to contentment,” said Thomas Hansen, co-author of the divorce study entitled, “Equality in the Home”. “The more a man does in the home, the … Read More... “Divorce And Household Chores, Does It Also Divide The Family?”

Divorce Linked to Stroke in Men

Study Shows Higher Risk Of Stroke For Men Of Parental Divorce

divorceIt often is said that children are the most affected by divorce. Now a Toronto study has found that men with divorced parents are significantly more likely to suffer a stroke than men from intact families, according to a recent study from the University of Toronto. The study, published in the International Journal of Stroke, shows that adult men who had experienced parental divorce before they turned 18 are three times more likely to suffer a stroke than men whose parents did not divorce. Women from divorced families did not have a higher risk of stroke than women from intact families.

The Toronto Star reports the University of Toronto researchers examined data from the US Center for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta (CDC) from a health risk survey involving 4,074 males and 5,886 females.  According to Esme Fuller-Thomson, Chair at University of Toronto’s Factor-Inwentash Faculty of Social Work and Department of Family and Community Medicine and lead author of the study, “the strong association we found for males between parental divorce and stroke is extremely concerning.”

Angela Dalton, co-author of the study, adds that “it is particularly … Read More... “Divorce Linked to Stroke in Men”

Shared Parenting Misconceptions in Ohio

shared parentingPreviously my colleague, Anne Shale, posted a very informative article laying out the legal distinctions between sole legal custody and shared parenting in Ohio. Here is the link to her article.  Even though it was posted 3 years ago, the information is still correct.  Nonetheless, I think it would be helpful to expand, clarify and shoot down several shared parenting myths.

Shared parenting requires an equal parenting time allocation.

Not true.  The hallmark of shared parenting is that both mother and father stand on the same legal footing with respect to custody.  Each are equal legal custodians of their child(ren).  Customarily, there is a provision in the plan that specifies whether mother or father’s city of residence is designated for schooling purposes. But this designation does not carry with it any greater custodial rights.  Under a shared parenting arrangement, the actual parenting time allocation can vary anywhere from a 50/50 split to just a few overnights per month for a parent. So don’t just assume that shared parenting can’t be an option just because of the amount of time the child will spend with each parent.

If we have shared parenting, I don’t have to pay support.

Not true.  Whether … Read More... “Shared Parenting Misconceptions in Ohio”

Divorce: Did Your Parents Marriage End When You Were 23 or Older?

Share Your Responses to This Important Divorce Research Survey!

divorceMary Murphy is a licensed clinical social worker and a doctoral candidate in counseling psychology from Oregon. I learned about Mary’s research project and survey from reading an article about it posted by Connecticut psychotherapist Donna Ferber. I have enjoyed collaborating in the past with Donna on a number of diverse topics. In Donna’s words, “Ms. Murphy’s work is of great value as she is looking to gather data from an often overlooked population. The effects of divorce on adult children are often minimized and her research helps shed a light on this issue.”

Here is Mary’s own introduction to her survey and research project:

Assumptions, Adult Children, and Divorce

Articles and books on divorce are replete with studies and discussions about the impact of divorce on children. That is, young and adolescent children. But what about the adult children? There is an emerging focus on considerations relevant to children who are adults when their parents divorce after decades of marriage. Cracks in assumptions, such as “they will be just fine”, or “they are mature now and have their own lives”, are being called into question. Regrettably, these assumptions and many Read More... “Divorce: Did Your Parents Marriage End When You Were 23 or Older?”

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