Delaying your divorce? Things you should know before filing for legal separation; an unexpected court decision for you and your spouse
When I began to practice family law in 1988, there were three (3) major proceedings in the Domestic Relations Courts of the State of Ohio:
- Divorce: Wherein one party files a Complaint for Divorce and the other party generally files an Answer and Counterclaim. The proceeding is assigned to a Judge and the case is managed by that Judge and the Court. The parties’ marriage would be terminated via a Final Judgment and Decree of Divorce. A divorce proceeding generally takes nine (9) months to twelve (12) months to reach closure.
- Dissolution: Wherein the parties file a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage with a Separation Agreement attached thereto. This proceeding is characterized as being “settled” at the time of filing. A hearing is held at least thirty (30) days after the filing of the Petition and the parties marriage is terminated via a Final Decree of Dissolution of Marriage. This proceeding is generally less expensive and less traumatic/emotional as all issues are “resolved” via the parties’ Separation Agreement.
- Alimony Only: Wherein one party, usually the “financially disadvantaged” Wife,
Generally speaking, the IRS does not allow a write-off for court costs and legal fees stemming from a divorce. It does, however, offer deductions for any portions of those fees related to tax advice and alimony.
On Saturday, February 22, 2016, I had the opportunity to attend a seminar entitled “Helping Children Succeed After Divorce.” The seminar was held at the Greene County Domestic Relations Court located at 595 Ledbetter Road, Xenia, Ohio. The cost for attending the program is included in the Court’s filing fee for either a divorce, dissolution of marriage, or legal separation proceeding. The Court has three (3) two-hour seminars per month to accommodate the working schedules of all parties. Two seminars are held in the evening from 6:00 to 8:00 p.m. and one seminar is held on one Saturday per month from 9:30 a.m. until 11:30 a.m.
Throughout the years and probably over dozens of cases, the United States Supreme Court has it made clear that Native American tribes are self-governing and sovereign entities whose powers are only limited by the federal government. As a result, reservations are considered independent of state and local power. With that in mind, what happens when a state court is presented with a divorce where one spouse is Native American? Does a state court even have jurisdiction (the right to hear a case and make a decision), or power over an enrolled tribal member? Does a state court have the ability to divide Native American assets upon divorce?
Obviously going through an unexpected or difficult divorce can be one of the most stressful experiences in an individual’s life. While many clients can navigate the process unassisted without professional help, others really cannot. Some people think that they can talk with family members or friends to help pull them through. Typically, however, those who are deeply distressed really need professional help by a therapist to guide them through the entire process and transition to their life post-divorce. Many people view having a therapist or counselor as a sign of weakness. It certainly is not. My experience as a divorce attorney for over 35 years is that when the attorney and therapist work together, it can often eliminate years of paralysis for a client.
Vikki Stark, a divorce recovery specialist and a family therapist for over thirty (30) years, published this book in 2015. Her stated purpose in writing the book was to make the “telling” to the children of the news that a family was going to be separating as non-traumatic as possible. To research this subject area, the author conducted over one hundred (100) interviews with children and with adults who were children when their parents separated and divorced. She also interviewed parents who had already done the “telling” to their children to learn about their positive and negative experiences in doing so. Finally, she read and researched many articles written by other professionals in the same field.
On September 5th, we posted a blog article about the necessity to be clear and precise in your divorce or dissolution documents if you chose to include a college expense provision. Truthfully, since my two sons have already graduated from college, I have not paid close attention to these escalating costs.