Share Your Responses to This Important Divorce Research Survey!
Mary Murphy is a licensed clinical social worker and a doctoral candidate in counseling psychology from Oregon. I learned about Mary’s research project and survey from reading an article about it posted by Connecticut psychotherapist Donna Ferber. I have enjoyed collaborating in the past with Donna on a number of diverse topics. In Donna’s words, “Ms. Murphy’s work is of great value as she is looking to gather data from an often overlooked population. The effects of divorce on adult children are often minimized and her research helps shed a light on this issue.”
Here is Mary’s own introduction to her survey and research project:
Assumptions, Adult Children, and Divorce
Articles and books on divorce are replete with studies and discussions about the impact of divorce on children. That is, young and adolescent children. But what about the adult children? There is an emerging focus on considerations relevant to children who are adults when their parents divorce after decades of marriage. Cracks in assumptions, such as “they will be just fine”, or “they are mature now and have their own lives”, are being called into question. Regrettably, these assumptions and many … Read More... “Divorce: Did Your Parents Marriage End When You Were 23 or Older?”
“I am in the divorce process up to my elbows. I have paperwork for my lawyer, deadlines for my job, parent conferences for my kids, friends coming for dinner. I have a birthday party to plan, a lawn to mow, a dog with fleas. I haven’t slept more than five hours a night for months. My grey hairs are coming in with a vengeance and my skin is breaking out. Most of the food in my refrigerator looks like science experiments. I have no idea of world events, latest movies, or current songs. I have to get my kids to soccer practice, karate and guitar lessons. I have grocery shopping, vet appointments, orthodontics appointments, child therapy appointments, ob-gyn appointments. I have appointments with my lawyer, my accountant, my therapist. I have appointments with my children’s lawyers and therapists. I even have an appointment to sit down and talk with my soon to be ex- husband about vacation schedules! I need to get the house painted. The car is making a clanking noise of undeterminable origin. The dishwasher is leaking. My kids came home with head lice. The dog vomited … 
Divorce rates for the general population throughout the United States have stabilized over the past several decades. However, that’s not true for baby boomers. Divorce rates among couples over 50 have doubled over the last two decades according to a recent study by Bowling Green State University Professor Susan L. Brown. In the 1990s, fewer than 1 in 10 people who divorced were 50 or older. In 2009, that figure soared to 1 in 4. Dr. Brown utilized data from the federal government’s 2009 American Community Survey. She also looked at demographics and found the highest rates were among black couples and the lowest rates among white couples. Older adults who divorced also tended to be less educated than those who remained married.
Many years ago, a singing icon and legend, Frank Sinatra, released a song entitled “The Second Time Around”…..its words begin as follows—“Love is lovelier the second time around; Just as wonderful with both feet on the ground; It’s that second time you hear your love song sung……..Makes you think perhaps that love, like you, is wasted on the young”…he goes on to praise the greatness of second-time relationships. But, what are the facts about second marriages? Do they fare well or do they fare poorly?
Similar to David Letterman’s Top Ten Lists, many family blog sites have postings regarding the top ten “Things to Do” following a divorce proceeding. This is my list of priority items to accomplish after the filing of the Final Judgment and Decree of 
Many of us associate the holidays with certain fond memories or warm feelings. It’s a time of year when many people make an extra effort to get together with family and friends. We often reconnect with relatives, spend extra time with our children, open presents, share great meals, sit around a fireplace, laugh, return gifts, watch football, nap, and hopefully get to see it snow.
Finding the right attorney for a divorce is an extremely important and personal decision. Take the time to properly pick your attorney. The outcome of your family law case will impact your future dramatically! Here are six keys to finding the right representation: