Military Parents Face Unique Homecoming Battles

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Upon Return, Military Parent Finds An Empty House and Their Child Abducted. What Happened To The Happy Reunion?

militaryIn the last few years we have all watched the televised homecomings of military personnel returning from tours of duty to see their loved ones, more often than not children overjoyed to be in the arms of fathers and mothers once again.  But what do we see of the not-too-happy homecomings where the returning parent’s outstretched arms are left empty and cold?  This is the picture which should be burned into our minds each time we see a happy reunion.  For each of those joyous televised feel-good sound bites there is a parent who will step into a battle more heartbreaking than the battlefield they have just left, more grievous than any physical injury they may have sustained along the way.

That battle will take place in a family courtroom somewhere “back home”, hopefully in their HOR, Home of Record as recorded in the military file, but increasingly in jurisdictions where the returning soldier or sailor has never been.  Why?  Because the parent remaining at home with the children … Read More... “Military Parents Face Unique Homecoming Battles”

Domestic Violence Specialist in Greene County, Ohio – Role And Function

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Sheri Hall, A Domestic Violence Specialist, Reveals How The Position Functions In Greene County, Ohio, Domestic Relations Court

Domestic Violence SpecialistOur law firm represents clients in the greater Dayton, Ohio geographical area and we routinely accept cases in the counties of Montgomery, Greene, Warren, Clark, Preble and Miami.  On a recent afternoon in August 2013, I spent time at the Domestic Relations Court of Greene County, Ohio to interview their Domestic Violence Specialist, Sheri Hall.  This Family Law Blog article is intended to provide information to our readers relative to the roles and functions of this Court employee.

Sheri Hall was hired by the Greene County Domestic Relations Court in 2001 while Judge Judson Shattuck was the Judge of that Court.  He hired her away from the Family Violence Prevention Center where she served as an Advocate/Admissions Employee.  She emphasized to me that while she served as an “advocate” for her former employer, she is to serve an objective role in her present position of employment.

To prepare Sheri for this position with the Court, she obtained a degree in Sociology with a minor in Psychology from Ohio … Read More... “Domestic Violence Specialist in Greene County, Ohio – Role And Function”

Divorce: Is Your Child Emotionally Manipulating You?

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How Emotional Minipulation Affects Family and Children in Divorce

Child Psychologist Gregory Ramey Offers His Advice For Parents After Divorce

divorce“I wouldn’t be having these problems if you hadn’t divorced my dad,” declared 15-year-old Lashona during an angry outburst with her mom. There was an uneasy silence followed by mom giving her a big hug and apologizing for the way the divorce has affected the family.

Mom’s reaction was completely understandable but wrong. She was the victim of her daughter’s emotional manipulation.

We all go about our day trying to influence other people to get what we want, and kids do the same thing. Emotional manipulation occurs when someone tries to elicit an emotional reaction from another to divert attention from the real issue. This is like a magician using misdirection, trying to get you to look elsewhere to conceal the magic trick. Kids can be good at such manipulation, taking advantage of parental empathy to escape personal responsibility. Here are the two most common types of misdirection used by kids.

  1. Guilt. Parents aren’t perfect and often feel badly for not living up to their own
Read More... “Divorce: Is Your Child Emotionally Manipulating You?”

Summer Vacations and the Divorced Family

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Divorced Family During Summer Vacations? How To Get through The Downtime

summer vacations divorced family“As I watched my children wait at the window for their father to arrive, I couldn’t believe the flood of feelings I experienced,” Julie, thirty-eight, a divorced mother of two boys, seven and nine, explained. “Their father is taking them to New York with his girlfriend. Her parents own a large summer house in the Adirondacks. She has six brothers and sisters, all married with children. They are all coming this week for a family reunion.”

“As an only child raised in a large city, I never had this kind of experience. I am excited for my children that they can have all these new people in their lives. They will get the experience of a large family. I find myself wishing that I could give them such an experience. I wonder if they will love this new family more than they love me. Of course, I know this is not the case. But sometimes, I feel so insecure.”

“I guess I am also envious of their experience. In some ways, I wish I were going, … Read More... “Summer Vacations and the Divorced Family”

Rape Aftermath: Child Custody And Control

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Can a Rapist Obtain Custody and Visitation of a Child Conceived Through Rape?

rapeVery few states have statutes limiting the ability of a man who fathered a child through rape from asserting his parental rights.  Rape and its aftermath is a serious and significant problem faced by our country.  Though many rapes go unreported, it is estimated that roughly 25,000 women become pregnant through rape each year. A significant amount of women who become pregnant through rape each year choose to raise their children.  Despite this, surprisingly little statutory protection exist for these women who chose to raise their children.

Statutory Protections Limited In Rape Parental Rights

Every state imposes criminal sanctions for rape. However, only sixteen states have promulgated statutes which aid women who became pregnant through rape and decided to raise their children. A man who fathers a child through rape has the same rights as any other father with respect to their children. Even in states offering some kind of statutory redress, the protections are typically quite limited. Several of the states with statutes offering redress require a conviction before there will be a … Read More... “Rape Aftermath: Child Custody And Control”

Same-Sex Marriage in Ohio: The Debate Begins!

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Ohio Judge Recognizes Same-Sex Marriage Performed In Another State As Legal

same-sex marriageOn Monday, federal Magistrate Judge Timothy Black could have opened the door to more lawsuits regarding same-sex marriage in Ohio.  Judge Black issued a temporary restraining order against multiple public officials (including Governor Kasich and Attorney General Mike DeWine) which prohibits those persons from enforcing provisions of Ohio law which prohibit state officials and institutions from recognizing same-sex marriages lawfully performed in other states in the case of Obergefell, et al. v. Kasich, et al., W.D.Ohio No. 1:13-cv-501 (July 22, 2013).

Background:

Jim Obergefell and John Arthur have been together for over 20 years.  John Arthur is currently bedridden with ALS, a neurological disease which all parties agreed will take his life in the very near future.   With the United States Supreme Court’s recent ruling in United States v. Windsor, striking down the federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), Jim and John decided it was time to take the plunge and get married.  Knowing that same-sex marriage is not permitted under Ohio law, Jim and John needed the marriage solemnized in one of the … Read More... “Same-Sex Marriage in Ohio: The Debate Begins!”

Parenting Conflicts Over Child Raising Goals?

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This is the companion article to Dr. Ramey’s article we posted on June 1, 2013, titled “Are Child Raising Strategies Causing Conflict in Your Marriage?” You might want to read them together!

child raising goalsJason’s dad loved sports as a youngster, and he encouraged athletic participation from the time his son was a toddler. This caused tremendous conflict between the parents as Jason’s mom felt her son’s interests were only intended to gain his dad’s approval.

Anna’s mom was fascinated by the reality-TV program “Toddlers and Tiaras” and began enrolling her 5-year-old daughter in local beauty pageants, which dad felt were primarily attended by “sexual perverts.” After two events, he told his wife that their marriage was in serious jeopardy if she ever brought their daughter to another pageant.

These are tough issues to resolve in a marriage because the disagreements are about goals, not strategies. When parents agree on the outcome (e.g., decrease temper tantrums), it’s easy for most parents to compromise and consistently try one strategy for several weeks. Keep careful records, and change the approach if the problem continues.

There’s no quick way to resolve arguments … Read More... “Parenting Conflicts Over Child Raising Goals?”

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