Fathers: 5 Ways American Fatherhood is Changing

Pew Research Statistical Findings Show Fathers Taking Active Role In Home Life

fathers childrenKim Parker, Director of Social Trends Research at Pew Research Center, published a very interesting article on June 15, 2015, in their “Fact Tank” about the changing role of fatherhood in today’s society. Some of the statistical findings were surprising in my mind.

“Today, fathers who live with their children are taking a more active role  in caring for them and helping out around the house. And the ranks of stay-at-home fathers  and single fathers have grown significantly in recent decades. At the same time, more and more children are growing up without a father in the home ”, Parker said.

Here are 5 of the findings she made from reviewing the Pew Research Center reports:

  1. Fewer dads are their family’s sole breadwinner. Among married couples with children under age 18, dual-income households are now the dominant arrangement (60%). In 1960, only one-in-four of these households had two incomes; 70% had a father who worked and a mother who was at home with the kids.
  2. Roles of dads and moms are converging. In 1965, father’s time was heavily concentrated in their employment duties, while mothers
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Divorce Book Review: DIVORCE: How to Tell The Kids: A Parent’s Guide to Breaking the News Without Breaking Their Hearts

Author Vikki Stark Conducts Over 100 Interviews With Children For New Book About Separation And Divorce

divorce children separationVikki Stark, a divorce recovery specialist and a family therapist for over thirty (30) years, published this book in 2015. Her stated purpose in writing the book was to make the “telling” to the children of the news that a family was going to be separating as non-traumatic as possible. To research this subject area, the author conducted over one hundred (100) interviews with children and with adults who were children when their parents separated and divorced. She also interviewed parents who had already done the “telling” to their children to learn about their positive and negative experiences in doing so. Finally, she read and researched many articles written by other professionals in the same field.

The main points from Chapter 1, A Bridge to Your Next Life, are as follows:

  1. You cannot avoid the anger or sorrow that your children may feel; but you can learn skills to reduce the trauma.
  2. You must become “attuned” to your children’s emotions. Attunement means listening carefully to what they are saying, acknowledging and accepting their feelings.
  3. Hearing or reading the actual words of children who have
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Narcissism: Is it all about you?

Rates of Narcissism Increasing With College Kids and Children

narcissism childrenI grew up during a time when my generation was encouraged to “do your own thing.” I wonder if we’ve taken that advice to the extreme.

Lots of different trends support the view that we’ve become incredibly self-absorbed, with a focus on what we want rather than on a concern for others. Status, power and physical attributes seem to be of highest priority.

Academic researchers have documented increasing rates of narcissism among college kids and an inflated sense of self-worth among children in general. Cosmetic surgery for kids has become increasingly commonplace. Appearances are more important than substance.

Parents are more likely to select unique rather than common names for their children. They want their children to stand out rather than fit in.

In a review of over 800,000 books published in the past 50 years, the use of first-person pronouns (I, me) increased 42 percent. It’s all about me.

Social media sites are used to document the most mundane of activities. Why do people feel compelled to let others know that they made cookies or went shopping at the mall?

Is there anything wrong with this trend of focusing … Read More... “Narcissism: Is it all about you?”

Children, App Technology, and Messaging Safely

How vulnerable Are Children In Today’s App Technology-Driven Internet World?

New Certified Messenging Chat App For Children Provides Safe Monitoring For Parents And Encourages Responsible Social Media Development

children app safetySummer is coming.

These are the words that children ages 6-17 dream of hearing everyday as they’re leaving school.  Ten to fifteen years ago, summer meant baseball, bikes, and adventures outside with your friends.  The recent changes in technology have also brought about changes in interest among younger individuals in our population.  Today, summer means iPads, TV’s, computers, and video games.  Technology has brought about more advanced innovations at a cheaper price. This allows for easier access to extremely advanced technology. Think for a second, when was the last time you saw a child on an iPad, a tween with an iPhone, or a teenager paying more attention to their phone than their surroundings.  This means your children, and your neighbors children can work those new computers, navigate your complicated phone, and dazzle with online gaming faster than you could ever hope to.

With advancement in technology, comes advancement in vulnerability.    Our society will always maintain a small population of predatory individuals who attempt and succeed to deceive and infiltrate the … Read More... “Children, App Technology, and Messaging Safely”

Foster Home Placement For Children: The Psycho-Legal Considerations

Foster Care Placement For A Child – What Effect Will Other Children In A Foster Home Have?

foster home childrenA healthy 3-year-old is placed in a foster home. A month later, a 16-year-old with a history of borderline personality disorder is placed in the same home. Without permission, the 16-year-old decides to give the 3-year-old a bath. Tragically, the 3-year-old drowns. Whatever the exact circumstances, and the foster parents’ behavior and liability aside, was it negligent of the agency initially to place the teenager in the same home as the young child?

When a child is placed in a foster home, it is the responsibility of the placing agency to evaluate the prospective home by considering its environmental, physical, emotional, medical, and educational benefits and hazards. Finding a compatible foster home is not just a question of finding the right foster parents. If there are other children in the home, they are also crucial to the selection process.

The placement process is a very personal and intentional one. Some variables can be controlled; others cannot. For instance, one controllable variable is the maximum number of foster children that can be placed in a foster home. For most states, it … Read More... “Foster Home Placement For Children: The Psycho-Legal Considerations”

Dads Should Work Harder on Forming Bonds with Their Children

Father’s Day Advice To Dads: Talk less and listen more To Your Children

dads childrenWhile parents worry about the impact of peers, technology or a crass culture, teens consistently report that their moms and dads exert the most important influence in their lives.

Moms trump dads when it comes to importance, with 47 percent of kids reporting that moms are their most influential relationships, compared to only 20 percent for dads. Why do kids feel that way?

Part of this may be due to the number of families headed up by moms, who are in charge of 75 percent of single-parent families. Kids just don’t have much access to their dads.

Even in two-parent families, children have little routine contact with their fathers. While this has changed dramatically in the past 50 years, research indicates that moms still spend twice as much time caring for kids as do dads.

The issue isn’t just the amount of time that dads spend with their children. Kids tell me they feel closer to their moms for the following reasons.

  1. Moms are nicer. Kids generally describe their moms as more positive and less reactive. Kids generally feel they get in more trouble with
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Parents: Balance Advice With What Works For You

How Parents Can Balance Own Perspective And Professional Advice When Raising Their Children

parents childrenWhen it comes to raising your children, how do you balance your own perspective with those professionals who have specialized knowledge and training?

A mom once asked me if it was wrong for her 11-year-old daughter to sleep in the same bed with her and her husband. I immediately began thinking about a variety of reasons about why that arrangement was undesirable. This mom was rather convincing that my concerns did not apply to her family. What may be true for most, she carefully explained, just didn’t apply to her situation.

A few days after his 2-year-old son was viciously beaten and killed, NFL star Adrian Peterson said he was “ready to roll” and played football for the Minnesota Vikings. His behavior defied the conventional wisdom that it was critical to suspend normal activities to work through the grieving process. Was Peterson the role model of resiliency, or an example of a selfish athlete who put his professional aspirations ahead of his family responsibilities and personal mental health?

The mom of a high school freshman works with her daughter three hours every night on homework to … Read More... “Parents: Balance Advice With What Works For You”

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