What I Wish All Kids of Divorced Parents Thought About the Holidays!

divorced parents holidays

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: Here is one Dr. Karen Finn wrote and posted to her blog on December 9, 2013. Her advice on kids of divorced parents, seems timeless and appropriate…

Divorced Parents: Divorce and the holidays can make things pretty miserable for kids. Here’s how to help your kids of divorce have happier holidays even if they aren’t with you.

divorced parents holidaysFor way too many kids of divorced parents the holidays aren’t all that merry. Instead, the holidays are filled with confusion and guilt. These kids experience confusion because they often have a hard time keeping track of schedules about when they’re going to be with Mom, when they’re going to be with Dad, and when they’re going to be with their friends. Then layered on top of this confusion is guilt.

Kids of divorced parents often feel the need to be actors. They don’t want to upset Mom by talking about Dad in front of her and they don’t want to upset Dad by talking about Mom in front of him. So, these kids learn to act like their other parent isn’t as important as the parent they’re with right now. The pressure to continue the charade amps up around … Read More... “What I Wish All Kids of Divorced Parents Thought About the Holidays!”

Ho- Ho- Ho-Holiday Tips for Stress Free Parenting

holidays divorce

How to Make the Holidays a Happy Time for you and your Children After Divorce

holidays divorceHolidays are a joyous time. Christmas or Hanukah can be most memorable for both adults and children, but they are especially magical moments for children. However, as adults who are going through a separation, a divorce, or who have already been divorced, the holiday times can be very stressful. I believe that most parents want their children to be happy, but especially so during holiday times. So, what to do to ensure the best possible outcome?

Communication and cooperation are the two main ingredients. The first thing that both Ex’s need to do is to thoroughly review their custody agreement for holidays. Your plan is most likely tailored to what you agreed with at the time of separation, or divorce with your attorney or pursuant to the Court’s Standard Parenting Order. They all vary. Some have elected for shared time during each holiday, and some have agreed to every other holiday. Regardless make sure you know what your Court Order states. It is vital to an easy transition for the kids that you and your Ex are in total agreement as to the … Read More... “Ho- Ho- Ho-Holiday Tips for Stress Free Parenting”

Blast From The Past: Thanksgiving: What Happens When College Students Return Home For The Holidays?

college students thanksgiving

PUBLISHER’S UPDATE: Here is one of my favorites posts about college students returning home for the holidays from back on November 21st, 2015! The advice rings as true now as it did then! …We have a ton of interesting articles in our archives of the Ohio Family Law Blog. Use our Search tool and enjoy a few oldie but goodies!

Parents and College Students Can Find Ways to Peacefully Coexist During Thanksgiving and the Holidays!

college students thanksgivingCall it a clash of cultures. Thousands of college students will soon travel home for Thanksgiving, in their minds, returning as independent adults, but still children in the eyes of their parents, says Scott Hall, a family studies professor at Ball State.

“When college students return home for their first Thanksgiving after having been away at school, they might feel like they are caught between two worlds: echoes of childhood dependency, and nearby adult-like independence,” Hall says. “It is easy to feel the tugs of long-established patterns of home life once stepping back into the family system only recently left behind. Such patterns (to the college students) suddenly feel threatening to the ‘new me’ that has been emerging at school.”

He says parents might … Read More... “Blast From The Past: Thanksgiving: What Happens When College Students Return Home For The Holidays?”

Should I Stay or Should I Go? To Divorce or Not?

divorce month holidays

The perfect month For filing for Divorce is…

Divorce for the Holidays! The Perfect Time to File for Divorce?

divorce month holidaysThis is the time of year that many people have this exact question on their mind. If you are old like me, perhaps you remember this song by the British punk rock band The Clash from 1982. Or if not, maybe later from a Levi’s 501 jeans television commercial shot in a pool hall.

Here are some of its memorable lyrics:

“Darling you got to let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
If you say that you are mine
I’ll be here till the end of time
So you got to let me know
Should I stay or should I go?

It’s always tease tease tease
You’re happy when I’m on my knees
One day is fine, and next is black
So if you want me off your back
Well come on and let me know
Should I stay or should I go?”

Click here to watch the Levi Jeans commercial including the song.

Why is January Often Referred to as “Divorce Month?”

There are many reasons that folks come in to my law office after the holidays… Read More... “Should I Stay or Should I Go? To Divorce or Not?”

Blast From The Past: Holidays: Just Say No & Feel Empowered!

Blast from the past 13 years Ohio Family Law Blog

Holidays Got Your Down?

PUBLISHERS NOTE: “Congratulations! We all made it through Thanksgiving. So, the mad dash of the holiday season is officially upon us. This sage advice from psychotherapist, Donna F. Ferber, from 2013 warrants another repost. Take a breath. Slow down. And just say “no”.”

A Guide to Happier Holidays: Replace HO–HO-HO with NO-NO-NO!

holidaysWell, the holiday hoopla is ramping up. Displays of sparkly red and green stuff has taken center stage in our stores, catalogues are arriving in droves, internet sites are offering deals, discounts and sales on every imaginable product. Magazines at the grocery checkout display unbelievable glossy covers of gorgeous people, in gorgeous houses, serving gorgeous food. Now with the sudden drop in temperature and the promise of snow this week, the reality that the holidays are descending on us is unavoidable.

It feels impossible to slow this down or simply get a grip. It is like being swept up in some tinselly tidal wave. I don’t want to shop yet; I still am cleaning out the garden! Yet, as the heat clicks on, and my sweaters and even gloves begin to take center stage, it cannot be denied. Here comes the holidays… Read More... “Blast From The Past: Holidays: Just Say No & Feel Empowered!”

My Divorce Timing – Should I File Now or Wait Until After the New Year?

divorce holidays

Covid-19 Pandemic Just One Of Many Factors That Lead To Divorce In 2020

divorce holidays

The timing of filing for a divorce can be a complicated decision. There are many factors to consider even in the normal Non-Covid times. But now there are even more factors to consider!

First off, in Ohio it is now too late to file a divorce or dissolution and get it finalized before the end of 2020. So, if that was your hope, you have missed that window of time.

I have been meeting with clients helping them formulate exit plans and discuss the timing options for filing their divorces. Here are some things to consider:

  1. Are You Safe?
     

    Needless to say, that the presence of domestic abuse is a huge factor to consider. If there is ongoing abuse, formulating an immediate ;escape plan’ should be a top priority. Figure out where you can move on a minute’s notice – perhaps temporarily stay with a family member, friend, co-worker, safe haven facility, or a church member? The existence of abuse may trump all the rest of the considerations mentioned below.

  2. COVID-19 Factors:
     

    Virtually everyone I meet with these days is grappling one way or another

… Read More... “My Divorce Timing – Should I File Now or Wait Until After the New Year?”

The Times of the Year When Most Divorces Occur

divorce holidays

Do Major Holidays Impact Your Marriage And Lead To Divorce?

divorce holidaysWeather, and holidays affect our moods, but do divorce rates spike with the seasons? According to researchers in the state of Washington, the peak months for divorce filings occur in March and August, which is the period following summer and winter holidays.

Many couples tend to steer away from filing for divorce around Christmas or Hanukah, and also around summer vacation time. These are typically special times for families and couples going through difficult times are hopeful that holiday/vacation time is a time to help mend a troubled relationship and to have a new start. People often approach the holidays or a vacation trip with high expectations, but these times can be very stressful and emotionally charged. When the occasion doesn’t live up to their expectations, the unhappiness festers.

According to the research done by University of Washington sociologists the two peak months for divorce filings are March and August. Many couples, at least with children, opt for August as it is after summer vacation and before the kids head back to school.

March Is The Time For Divorce According To Study

But why March? The holidays are well … Read More... “The Times of the Year When Most Divorces Occur”

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