kids Archives - Ohio Family Law Blog

Effects of Divorce on Children – Some Interesting Statistics

Financial Statistics Reveal Compelling Divorce Data

The Financial and Emotional Impact for Kids of Divorce – What do the Statistics Really Say?

I have always found statistics and research studies quite interesting. I like to look at them to see how they compare to my own perceptions and life experiences.

As a divorce lawyer for 40 plus years, and publisher of the Ohio Family Law Blog since 2009, keeping on top of divorce trends is something I enjoy doing. In searching the internet recently, I came across the website www.financesonline.com. I found this website to have an amazingly broad aggregation of divorce related information and statistics (including footnotes to their sources). I spent a fair amount of time reading it and thought sharing the link might be worthwhile to our blog readers. Here is a sample section. Perhaps it will pique your interest!

EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN:

Divorced spouses evade over 30% of child support payments, with less than 50% paid in full. (Leefeldt, 2019)
Moreover, only 43.5% of custodial parents receive full support from their former spouses. (Leefeldt, 2019)
In addition, more than $10 billion in child support payments in the US go uncollected. (Leefeldt, 2019)
26.5%

Tips on Planning a Vacation with the Kids Post-Divorce

Tricks And Tips To Make Vacation Time With The Kids Fun Post-Divorce

The ink is dry on the papers, and you are officially divorced! Time to take a vacation with the kids, but this is your first time traveling solo with the kids. It can be a little intimidating, but it doesn’t need to be. There are tricks and tips to make sure it is a fun and memorable time for all.

If you are leery of going it alone with the kids, consider asking another adult to accompany you. Perhaps a grandparent or aunt or uncle might be happy to go along. They might be happy to spend some time with your children, perhaps giving you a respite to enjoy a shopping trip or perhaps a museum or something which might not appeal to your kids.

Destination For A Vacation

As they say in real estate, location, location, location. The same applies to picking a destination for a vacation. You need to select a destination according to the ages of your children. Smaller children tend to enjoy staying in one place and are content to play in the sand. So booking a condo or hotel at … Read More... “Tips on Planning a Vacation with the Kids Post-Divorce”

How to Help Your Kids Deal with Tough Times

PUBLISHERS NOTE: While this advice by Dr. Ramey was geared towards kids, I think it also applies to adults going through “tough times” like a divorce. What do you think?

Should We Protect Our Kids From Life’s Tough Times Or Should We Only Help Them?

Bad stuff happens to our kids every day. Wise parents don’t go to extraordinary means to protect kids from life, but rather they help their children manage minor frustrations or major traumas. These are the ways I approach these kids in my office.

This will pass. Youngsters often think that the intense emotional pain they feel today will continue forever. Adults know that both good and bad times are transitory. It’s hard to explain that to kids, who may feel that you are discounting their feelings.
Avoid mis attribution. In trying to make sense of their parents’ divorce or being rejected from a basketball team, youngsters often come up with some very weird and inaccurate explanations. They may blame themselves or some irrelevant or random event. It’s difficult for kids to understand that the reasons why things occur are often unknown, and unknowable.
Get on with your life. People come to my office wanting to

The Hidden Advantages to Divorce When it comes to Kids

Shared Parenting Arrangement In Divorce Allows Parent To Be A Better Person And Better Parent To Their Kids

Divorce is generally bad for kids, and the effects are long-lasting. However, a mom recently explained a hidden advantage of divorce. Wouldn’t it be great to achieve this benefit without actually separating from your spouse? As with many married couples, life and romance changed with the arrival of three kids. Both parents were devoted to their children and did everything together. The dad didn’t simply help out with housework but saw it as a joint responsibility with his wife. This all seems pretty ideal, but it wasn’t.

In always doing things together as a family, this mom explained she never had any time for herself. She stopped doing yoga, meeting friends at Starbucks or retreating into the world of reading science fiction. After a while, the inevitable happened. This couple was great at parenting, but poor at taking care of themselves and each other.

Life changed dramatically for this mom after the divorce. In the shared parenting arrangement, she suddenly had lots of time for herself. This allowed her to be more attentive to her needs and become a better … Read More... “The Hidden Advantages to Divorce When it comes to Kids”

4 Ways to Identify a Lonely Child

Why is loneliness hard to diagnose in kids?

Twelve-year-old Josh and his mom had accomplished a lot during seven sessions of therapy. He was getting along better with his little sister, and his interactions with his mom were more positive.

It wasn’t until I discussed terminating therapy that Josh finally told me how lonely he felt, which had never come up during our meetings.

While Josh had many acquaintances, he didn’t have any close friends. While superficially pleasant and outgoing, he was fearful of saying what he really felt and thought. If people knew the real Josh, he felt he would be ridiculed and rejected. He was living a dual life. His external behavior was ordinary and acceptable. His inner world was solitary and disengaged.

He cried in my office for about 10 minutes, and then profusely apologized for using so many tissues. He quickly retreated to his pretend world and reassured me that he was doing fine.

Loneliness is hard to diagnose in kids, and often can be mistaken for other conditions.

Loneliness is not depression. Kids who are depressed generally have little energy and experience no enjoyment in most activities. Loneliness is also different from being introspective … Read More... “4 Ways to Identify a Lonely Child”